“I just don’t like to argue” sometimes just means “I don’t know how to stand up for myself“. And sometimes arguing for the sake of arguing is just you being belligerent. So what’s the difference?
The difference is in what the end game is. If when it’s over you’ve given up pieces of yourself so someone can’t be bothered and gets to always do their favorite thing, that’s not good. That’s codependency.
Sometimes it’s okay to say no. It’s fine to say “I don’t agree with that”. If we believe in something, we either need new information to change our mind or we need to stand in our decision with the information we made it with.
So before someone tells you “you just like to argue” or before you convince yourself your decision or opinion is irrelevant, be sure you’re not just having a conversation with an extremely selfish person who cares more about doing their favorite thing all the time than they do about you.
Letting people roll all over you is not the same as “not wanting to argue” and not saying what you mean is a lot like not having a backbone. You’re not belligerent, you just want to be heard.
Deeper Than a Puddle 